How to Build Self Esteem
What is Self Esteem?
Positive self-esteem is a sign that people feel good about themselves and their lives. This makes them more resilient and more able to deal with the ups and downs of life.
People with low self-esteem are more critical of their own abilities. These people find it more difficult to overcome setbacks and challenges. They may avoid situations that are difficult. However, this can lead to a decrease in self-esteem and a feeling of inferiority.
Low self-esteem can have a negative impact on almost every aspect of your life, from your relationships to your job to your health. You can improve your self-esteem with the help of various types of mental counseling. These are the steps to take.
These steps are based on Cognitive Behaviour Therapy.
1. Identify troublesome situations or conditions. Think about situations or conditions that can lower your self-esteem.
2. Be aware of your thoughts and beliefs. Once you have identified trouble situations, pay close attention to what you think about them. This includes your self-talk and interpretations of the situation. You might have positive, negative, or neutral thoughts. These beliefs can be rational, based upon facts or reason, or irrational based on false information.
Consider whether these beliefs are true. What would you tell a friend about these beliefs? You wouldn’t tell them to a friend if you didn’t want to.
3. Refute negative or incorrect thinking. Your initial thoughts may not be the best way to see a situation. Consider whether your perspective is supported by facts and logic, or whether there are other possible explanations.
It can be difficult to spot inaccuracies within your thinking. Although many beliefs and thoughts are held for a long time, they can seem normal and factual.
Pay attention to thoughts that can lower self-esteem. You can’t have it all. You can see everything as either good or bad. You can see that if I fail to complete this task, it is a failure. Mental filtering. Negatives are what you see and you dwell on them. This can distort your perception of people or situations. Example: “I made a mistake in that report, and now everyone will see I’m not up for this job.”
Converting positives into negatives. Negatives can be used to discredit your successes and other positive experiences. You might say, “I did not do well on that test because it was easy.” Jumping to negative conclusions. When there is no supporting evidence, you can jump to a negative conclusion. Example: “My coworker hasn’t responded to my email so I must have done some to make him mad.”
It is easy to mistake feelings for facts. It is easy to confuse beliefs or feelings with facts. You can say, for example, “I feel like I’m a failure so I must be a failed.” Negative self-talk can lead to self-deprecating humor, low self-esteem and self-deprecating behaviour. You can say, “I don’t deserve anything better.”
4. Change your beliefs and thoughts. Replace negative thoughts with positive, constructive ones. These strategies are for you:
Be positive. Be kind to yourself and encourage others. Instead of worrying that your presentation will not go smoothly, tell yourself, “Even though this is difficult, I can handle it.”
Be kind to yourself. Everybody makes mistakes, but they don’t reflect on you. These are isolated moments in time. You can say, “I made an error, but it doesn’t make you a bad person.”
Avoid using’should’ or’must’ words. These words can lead to unreasonable expectations on you and others. These words can be removed from your mind to help you set realistic expectations.
Keep your focus on the positive. Look at the positive aspects of your life. Think about the skills that you have used to deal with difficult situations. Take stock of what you have learned. What can you do to make it a positive experience next time?
Label upsetting thoughts. Negative thoughts don’t have to be negative. Negative thoughts can be used as signals to create new, healthier patterns. Ask yourself: “What can you do to make this less stressful?”
Encourage yourself. Recognise yourself for making positive changes. Example: “My presentation may not have been perfect but my colleagues asked questions, and remained engaged, which indicates that I achieved my goal.”
Although these steps may seem difficult at first, they will become easier as you practice. You can change your thinking or counter the negative thoughts that contribute to low self-esteem by learning to recognise them. You will be able to accept yourself as a person. Your self-esteem will increase and your sense of well-being and confidence will likely skyrocket.
Show Appreciation To Yourself
These are just a few of the many things you can do to show your appreciation. You can do this by:
Take care of your health. Good health guidelines are important. Exercise at least 30 minutes per day, every day. Get lots of fruits, vegetables and other healthy foods. Avoid sweets, junk food, and animal fats.
Do what you love. Make a list of the things you enjoy doing. You should try to complete something on that list each day. Spend time with people that make you smile. Do not waste your time with people who aren’t treating you well.